Thursday, 27 November 2014


Here's a conversation I had with my husband, Abu Yemen, yesterday.

Him- What's for dinner?
Me- Frittata
Him- tittata?
Me- Frittata
Him- Parata?
Me - Eggs. We're having f *&^ing eggs.
See, this is why we can never be posh!

I've been nominated  to post five photos that make me happy.

Here goes!
Shinas College of technology poetry evening.

I love these girls!

Later that night Ascander's appendix burst and he was rushed to hospital :(

Cake. I love cake!

My world!

My first Toastmasters speech

I've recently joined Buraimi Hospitals Toastmaster club.

To start off my journey I had to give my first Icebreaker speech. I hate presenting at the best

 of times so my nerves were all over the place. I managed to make my audience laugh, and

 pass my first challenge. Oh and I was elected president of the club. 

Here is the speech I delivered.

Mr. Toastmaster- ladies and gentlemen

First, let me apologise for my nerves, I'm used to standing in front of twenty students, and judging from their quiz marks today they don’t seem to have understood much of what I've been saying for the past 6 weeks.
Anyway, I'm a teacher. Teaching is my passion- whether I am teaching a class grammar, police officers' communication skills, Omani teachers’ classroom management skills, teaching my son to drive OR teaching my husband to put the toilet seat down. I always seem to be teaching. I love teaching and I teach with passion and straight from the heart. I will elaborate on this in a bit.

Me, well my name is Joanne, Jo for short or you can call me Mr. Jo, my students do!  I’m T- minus 27, I’m from the UK. I’m married to Nadhem, he’s originally from Yemen, and we’ve been married for twenty one years. We married in the UAE back in the day when locals would walk down the street and say “oh look, a foreigner.” Now we walk down the streets of the UAE and say “Oh look, a local!”  We have a son, his name is Ascander, and I met my son for the first time this week when Omantel crashed. I forgot that he was living in the spare room. Anyway, he’s 18, and like all teenagers he knows everything there is to know about nothing.

So how did I end up in Oman? Well the family and I flew from Manchester airport and landed in Beijing, China. We had a stopover there for three years and we met some interesting people there.  I taught Chinese high school students. It was a nice humbling experience. From there our next stopover was Morocco; we stayed for a year before the last leg of our flight to Oman.  My first job in Oman was in Shinas. I love Shinas, and the people there. I can spot a Shinasian from a mile away, usually his is headdress is pulled halfway over his eyes. From Shinas I moved to Sohar University and from there to the University of Buraimi. I'm on my third year here.
I’m a perfectionist, and I have put my job before most things, on occasions my family and health have suffered. Last year I was invigilating a nursing exam and in the exam I had terrible acid, never have I had such an acid attack before. Ever the professional, I carried on with the exam and after it was over I went back to my office…..And had a heart attack. I ended up here in the emergency room in Buraimi hospital. I remember June 13th like it was yesterday. I remember the nurse telling me that she had to cut my bra off, and I remember shouting at her that it was a Marks and Spenser’s bra and that it cost me 26 rial. SNIP, she cut it in half. She was nice enough to put it in a bag and gave it back to me when I left the ICU. I also lost my favourite shoes here, yes, someone pinched my sandals so nurses here tonight, if you see me walking round looking at your feet, I’m still looking for them! I spent a few days here in the hospital before being transferred to Muscat hospital where the amazing Dr Mohammed Mukami worked his magic.
Tonight, I am taking no chances. You may have noticed that I have worn boots, as boots are much harder to remove without the wearer knowing. They may only be pull on boots, but, boots are so much harder to lose than sandals, I am teaching some of Oman’s bright stars. I never underestimate my students, well apart from Khalid, who had the verb to be nicely written on the inside of his hand today in the quiz, I do worry about Khalid! And I am proud to be teaching on my last leg of my flight. Thank you!

Saturday, 11 October 2014

Friday, 1 August 2014

Mistaken Identity of the worse kind!

Yesterday, my son and I drove over to Sohar to visit my friend Cathy. Feeling a little peckish at lunch time we drove  to McDonald's in Safer Mall. On the way to McD's  we had to walk by Costa coffee, and as I walked I noticed  a head of the most amazing PINK hair.......It's Donna, my Facebook friend from Muscat! I bounded over, as you do, and proceeded to hug and kiss her. I was so happy to see Donna. You see, I've never actually met Donna, she's just been my friend on Facebook for a few years. I asked how her trip was, she'd just been to Dubai for Eid, she said she'd just got back from Scotland....This is where the alarm bells started to ring.

Donna is from Australia and not Scotland. I backed away slowly, very slowly, saying that I needed to eat. I told my son to "move it" and "fast" he was as embarrassed as me  once I explained what I had done.

That poor woman, who I have since found out is named Sharon, must have thought I was a right nutter.

I have since made Facebook contact with Sharon, she's a member of a couple of my groups, and apologized for freaking her out in Costa Coffee. She'll recover from this ordeal one day, I hope! Not sure if I will!


Thursday, 24 July 2014

How to Highlight and Contour: The Ultimate Guide

Ok, so I'm no beauty expert but this girl needs a little help to make herself look and feel a little better. Being a teacher means you're always on a stage so  I've learnt the art of contouring; too many crinkles not to. I'm not sure if I'm doing it the right way, I'm sure I'm not, but I'll continue to spend that extra ten minutes in the morning blending and shaping.

This is my idiots cheat guide, I'm sure there are betters one available but this one works for me. 

 This is my face with no contouring, when I've perfected my new found craft/skill/magic power I'll add a new photo.  

Happy contouring people. x

Ten days holiday- Oh happy days

Two holidays rolled into one to make one humongous holiday of ten days. 

 Muscat Daily Newspaper: His Majesty Sultan Qaboos Bin Said has issued a Royal Order declaring July 24, 2014 as national holiday   for the employees of the ministries, public authorities and other administrative units of the state, on the eve of the Blessed Renaissance day.
At the same time, Minister of Manpower has also announced the holiday on occasion of the Blessed Renaissance Day for the workers of companies and institutions of private sector on Thursday, July 24, 2014.
The minister's statement said that owners of businesses and workers can agree on compensation for the holiday if required according to the nature work. Similarly, it is also necessary to compensate those workers whose weekly holidays fall during the holidays, the Ministry of Manpower statement clarified.
Eid Al Fitr holidays
Ministry of Manpower has announced that the Eid Al Fitr holidays would be from July 27 to July 31, 2014.
The statement released by the Ministry said that the owners of businesses and workers can agree for compensation for work during these holidays, if required by the nature of work, during this period. Similarly, it is also necessary to compensate those workers whose weekly holidays fall during the holidays, the statement added.

Question: So what am I going to do for the next ten days?
Answer: Not very much at all!

Today I slept till 10:30. I must have needed it as I normally wake up at 6 every morning.
On Monday I managed to sleep in and wake up ten minutes before my first class at 8. I woke up and fell over as I  ran to phone a friend to ask her to cover me. I burst into my son's room and asked why he didn't wake me up. He said he didn't  want to piss me off by waking me up and that I would shout at him. "Well, I'm shouting at you now!" The housemaid and my son were apparently stood at my bedroom door at 7am telling each other  "It's your turn" to wake the wicked witch up. They both agreed to leave me.

I got to work about twenty minutes after class, and my class shouted  "ABSENT" to me as I walked into class. I couldn't get it together for the rest of the day. On my way home I stopped at LuLu and picked up two large chicken biryani's and chucked them in the slow cooker on low ready for fatour at 7. Hubby was non the wiser that they were from LuLu and I never said they weren't. 

Tuesday, 15 July 2014

Day Five- 3 positive thoughts for 5 days.

1) Today is my last day sharing my positive thoughts. Tomorrow I will go back to being a miserable ungrateful person.

2) Today's class was on musical preferences. My class had no interest in my musical taste, at all. They like Michael Jackson....They were sad to hear that he died, five years ago.

3) Today is Tuesday. Tuesday is our Hump Day. To pay homage to this great day I am sharing this advert with you.    
Click  Hump Day

Monday, 14 July 2014

Day Four- 3 positive thoughts for 5 days.

Day Four- 3 positive thoughts for 5 days.

1) Amazing how you can understand someone that doesn't speak your language and you don't speak theirs. This morning, at 6am I might add, my housemaid told me, in Telugu (her language), that she had been up six times during the night with the runs . I know that's what she meant as she made farty sounds with her mouth, held six fingers up, and rubbed her tummy! 

2) Today is Monday, which means tomorrow is Tuesday. The weekend is nearly here. Horrah!

3) A Omani man asked me for my phone number today. I told him no and that he was welcome to the phone number of my husband. He declined.

Day Three- 3 positive thoughts for 5 days

Day Three- 3 positive thoughts for 5 days.

1) Happy that I have a job. Not happy that I have to be here today.

2) Today is Sunday, which can only mean one thing.....Tis Monday tomorrow.

3) Controlled laughter is a good thing. Happy that I managed to not laugh today when my student told me she likes black dicks.!

Saturday, 12 July 2014

How to be happy, according to me :)

Happiness is

My grill is not the best grill in the world and my oven usually catches on fire when I've attempted to use it. I read online that cheese on toast could be made in a toaster easily.This is how I used to make cheese on toast.

In LuLu yesterday I found a little toaster grill for 6 rial, about 9.10 quid

and now I can make this....everyday if I like :)

Happiness is being married for twenty years and you still  like each other

This boy makes me happy.....every single day

This woman makes me laugh all the time. Going to miss her when she moves to Beirut. 

Click here to watch a funny video clip of her.

Why I love living in Oman

Oman- A country of peace and beauty

His Majesty Sultan Qaboos bin Said. A man of peace.

So where is Oman? 

Click here and Watch This

To view Multimedia News Release, go to

Here are some of my photos of Oman

Old houses of Buraimi

Buraimi Fort

On the way to Wadi Hibbi

On the way to Wadi Hibbi



Wadi Hibbi

Driving from Buraimi to Sohar

Always stop for a Willi!